


Potions complicate things very fast

by DrawingBooks_Louayokes_5



Series: Potions complicate things very fast - series [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-30
Updated: 2017-04-13
Packaged: 2018-08-28 01:28:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 14,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8425390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrawingBooks_Louayokes_5/pseuds/DrawingBooks_Louayokes_5
Summary: Where Arthur isn't feeling well and Merlin accidently gives him a love potion.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> Lately, I had the idea to write some fanfic about Merlin and Arthur. They're foolish as ever. I want to apologize if it isn't amazingly British because I am no Brit. I try :) Also I apologize for any made grammar mistakes because that happens really often. I am very proud of the word 'nightstand' because it is perfectly British, so that I know ... nevertheless, I also use it. And please write all mistakes I made in the comments, too, there must be plenty ... a few words, maybe.  
> I hope you enjoy!

### Chapter 1

 

"Out of bed" Merlin demands.

 The royal prince mumbles something half asleep and turns from one side to the other.

 "Come on! The sun is shining, the birds are singing and you my friend are still in bed! So - get - out!" He says the latter, while he fights with Arthur for the possession of the blanket, which Arthur holds in an iron grip.

 "I believe I will be sick. Am sick. Terribly!" Arthur says still fighting with Merlin.

 "Well then." Indeed, Merlin lets go of the blanket so hectically that Arthur is almost flung in the cushions.

 "Merlin!" Arthur shouts and shots Merlin one of his 'what-do-you-think-you-are-doing-silly-I-am-going-to-kill-you' looks and then covers his body up to his face with the blanket.

 "All right. I will get you a potion from Gaius. You will be better soon."

 Merlin leaves the room, just to come back in seconds after he left. "And what _exactly_ would be your illness?"

 Arthur throws the blanket away. "This is like teaching a little kid that Dragons are and animals are not able to speak," he mutters angrily.

 "Aren't Dragons animals?" Merlin wonders.

 He has to pay with another kill-look from Arthur. The only difference to the last one was, that it was his more simple 'I-am-going-to-kill-you-and-I-will-not-make-it-quick' one. The simple thing about it is that you don't have to think of whether responding and saying what you think or running. Here it's only left one option to pick: running.

 The prince thinks a second and then says that he wishes a potion for morning-illness, like the feeling of needing to throw up.

 "That would make you pregnant." His servant comments without thinking.

 "Out now! I want my potion!"

 Merlin is very quick by getting out of the room and this time, he doesn't come back.

 

 "Gaius!" Merlin enters the chamber.

 "Yes, Merlin?" his tutor says sleepily. "What's the matter?" Yawning he stretches both arms in the air.

 "Arthur claims being sick. He wants a potion to get better."

 "Oh right. Where do I ... wait a minute or two Merlin ..." Gaius yawns again, louder this time.

 "Are you feeling all right?" Merlin asks.

 "Yes, I'm just a bit tired."

 "OK. Are you in want of anything?"

 "Silence, for that I can finish this potion." Gaius mutters.

 Merlin leaves to his room takes himself off to bed and grips his magical book. Maybe half an hour later Gaius walks in, his hands hold a vial. "Oh Gaius, you made it!" Happy Merlin removes the vial out of Gaius' hands and ignores the words his master is lazily mumbling.

 "Get some sleep, Gaius."

 Merlin looks at the potion in his hands.  The vial is filled with some dark red color, like cherries.

 "Huh" makes Merlin. He did not think that such a potion would have this sort of color.

 He shrugs and then hurries to get back to Arthur's room.

 "Do you have it?"

 "Yes. Take it before sunset and soon you will get better." Merlin smiles his pooty smile.

 

* * *

 

 Here just a little commentary (I know, it's not even been one side and she is already talking):

 Like I said, I try. I wonder if I should have said .. gosh, what was this word - Dinky? (or something sorry) instead of pooty, because I googled other words/synonyms for 'cute' and 'pooty' (it's the same, pooty means pretty so that I know) and then I got this word. I did not know it, so I didn't use it. Is it a British word? The was no other explanation for me so I just chose to believe it is. Now I continue the story.

 

* * *

 

 

"Good." Arthur picks the potion out of Merlin's hands, turns around and cautiously puts it at the nightstand. He turns around. "What is in it?" he asks. "Because it is so red."

 "Just some berries. And herbs. That's all I guess."

 "Stunning" His voice was impregnated by sarcasm.

 "No problem."

 Merlin left his friend alone, closing the door shut smiling.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just finished this and I'll look over it soon for correcting some mistakes. If you find some in the text, please tell me in the comments. I would appreciate the help.  
> And as always, I hope you enjoy!

### Chapter 2

 

 The night went by like nothing. Around two o'clock in the morning, Merlin finally put the book down and fell asleep.

 Now he is on the way to bring Arthur his breakfast. "Good morning!", he already shouts, opening the door spirited. Normally, Arthur gets up much earlier, if Merlin just shouts at him already before he's opening up the curtains of the window.

 One could imagine how startled Merlin is, when a fully clothed, oddly _awake_ Arthur walks right up to him, grinning from ear to ear.

 "Yeah. Morning Merlin. What a wonderful morning, isn't it? I feel super. Tell Gaius that his potion is amazing, no --- Magnificent! That's the word. What is that? Oh, wine grapes! I love wine grapes."

 Merlin stares at Arthur in disbelieve. "Arthur. Are you feeling alright?"

 "Like I said, I feel super!"

 Arthur takes a wine grape off the plate Merlin holds. He looks at him, sticks the grape in his mouth and chews it. While he does, his expression changes. His eyes get something dreamy and Merlin starts to feel observed.

 Arthur's hand stretches out for Merlin's face.

 "Arthur. Why the hell are you behaving like this?"

 "Maybe it is because I don't want to throw up anymore. Now, what are my duties for today?"

 "Um ... you have to take a look at the new ... what was it? The new head collars for the horses, there are also saddles. And you have training - sword fight is next week - in the afternoon."

 Arthur's hand drops.

 "Wonderful! Let's get on with it, shall we?"

 He walks past Merlin without taking one look at the food and runs out.

 "He didn't even give me orders!" Merlin says to the empty room, staggered he stands there until he can get himself to make the bed, open the curtains and clean the room a bit.

 

 "I'm telling you, it was weird!"

 Later that day, Merlin stands in the chamber with Gaius who is fiddling with some new potion.

 While Merlin's speaking, Gaius drops 'uh' and 'oh's here and there. In fact, he doesn't even listen to Merlin's words, he just focuses on the potion.

 "This is for Arthur." he finally says, handing Merlin the potion. It is green, a healing potion.

 "What is this?" Merlin asks.

 "The potion, for Arthur. Really. Merlin, you asked me about one, yesterday."

 Merlin's heart stops.

 "But, I already gave one to him."

 "Which one?"

 "Yesterday you gave me a red potion and -"

 "Merlin, it was a love potion for a man in the city!"

 "This explains much." Merlin mutters. Then he gets suspicious. "Why would you give me a love potion? Why did you even brew one?"

 "None of your business, boy. Keep Arthur out of trouble."

 Merlin snorts. "Yeah, right, there you go! How does it come that it always lies on me to clear the messes which everybody makes?!?"

 He says no more word and just furiously runs out the chamber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What'ya think? :)  
> C u


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the new Chapter, I'm sorry that it took me so long to write this :/  
> I hope you like it!

### Chapter 3

 

 Arthur already waits for Merlin. "Merlin, there you are."

 The Princes face lights up immediately and he jumps from the bed.

 "What are you -" Merlin tries to say but is shut up by Arthurs chest being pushed into his face. Arthur _hugs_ him.

 "Arthur, I can't breathe." Merlin mumbles.

 Arthur, who doesn't understand what Merlin was saying, just pulls him in closer. "Did I _ever_ tell you, that your hair smells like honey?" He breathes in deep.

 "No, you did not and I believe there is no reason for such an annotation" Merlin shouts, then sighs and tries to detach himself from the embrace.

 "What a waste! I should have told you because it smells ..." He breathes in again "... wonderful."

"Alright." Merlin speaks to himself. "Would you let go of me now?"

"Of course." Arthur frees Merlin, who inhales happily.

"Where is the potion?"

"Why are you asking?"

"I need it. That's why."

"You need it. For who?" Sadly, the potion did not make a fool out of Arthur.

Merlin struggles to find an excuse. "There's something wrong with it." he makes up.

"No, it is perfectly fine!"

"I really need it, Arthur."

"All right, all right. There is just nothing of it left."

Merlin can't believe it. "You drank the whole bottle?"

Arthur shrugs his shoulders. "I just thought; more lasts longer. Is something wrong?"

"No" Merlin smiled fake "of course not." Then his face became thoughtful.

"If you keep making that face it'll get stuck like that." Arthur said, holding a finger up.

 Merlin stops frowning. "Very funny. Do you have the bottle?"

"Yeah. But I want something for it." Arthur's face became dreamy just like this morning.

Merlin stared at Arthur. "What?"

Arthur grinned confidently of victory. "Nothing much." He comes a little nearer.

"You scare me." Merlin says.

"Sh ..." Arthur makes and a few steps later, they're standing nose-to-nose.

Merlin is so shocked, that he can barely move.

Arthur slowly leans in and - the door opens with a loud bang.

"Arthur, I wanted to talk to you about -" the voice stops.

Arthur steps away from the frozen Merlin who takes it a few seconds to thaw again.

"Hello Guinevere, what can I help you with."

The young sorcerer swirls around and sees who Arthur spotted before - Gwen, standing in the doorframe, looking at Merlin in a way that could express a deep dark confusion.

Merlin has the feeling that this moment would be the most embarrassing in his whole life.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it took me incredibly long to write this! I had so much stuff going on at school causing that I did not make it. I am so sorry!  
> Also, Donald Trump going to be President shocked me so much I wasn't able to write. (This was just an explanation, please do not comment with your opinions on this, comments are for the story, not for politics)  
> Here's the 4th Chapter, I hope you enjoy!!!

### Chapter 4

 

Merlin could say it was a nice experience. But if he is honest, it is extremely uncomfortable watching Arthur and Gwen talk for he-doesn't-have-a-clock-long and slowly going backward without being noticed.

The time he reaches the bed he has to suppress the desire of respiring loud.

After a short glance to Arthur and Gwen, who are in an odd position (normally, Arthur is all opened up in front of Gwen, but now, his arms are crossed in front of his chest and though Merlin can't see his face, he knows he frowns), Merlin pretends to make the bed.

While he does, he searches for the potion. Finally, he finds the vial inside the nightstand.

He grins and reaches out, but freezes right in the motion.

There are arms around his waist and a heavy head lies between his scapulas.

 Merlin draws the air sharply. "Is Gwen gone?" he asks with a  trembling voice.

"Yes, she is."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Why am I doing what?"

"Hugging me. I thought you're not going for hugs."

It was quiet for some time while Arthur thought for an answer.

"I don't know. I just think you are very, very beautiful."

"You're supposed to think that about Gwen."

"Why should I think about her like that? Whatever happens in your little head-" Arthur turns Merlin around "- there is nothing between me and her." He takes Merlin's hand and places it on his chest.

Merlin's eyes dilate and his look becomes horrified.

"I said _don't worry_. There is just us."

  _Oh God, no, just no._ Merlin thinks.

"I wouldn't dream of it." Merlin announces, steps away - and bumps into the nightstand.

"Not so tempestuous." Arthur giggles.

Merlin has never ever heard his Prince giggle.

"Like I said" Arthur reaches out for Merlin's cheek and holds it gentle "there is just us."

"Right. But you know what - uh ... sweety? I really have to go ... sorry." Merlin grabs the vial, which is completely empty, and then he is up and away.

 

"Gaius! The love potion ... he drank it. All of it."

"All of it?"

Merlin nods quickly.

"And what does he do? Is he in love?" Gaius steps further towards Merlin and lays his hand on Merlin's shoulder.

"Yes." Merlin agrees.

"With who then?"

"Seems like it's me."

"Oh Boy."

 Gaius squeezes the shoulder. "So I believe then, I make the remedy."

"Yes. And Gaius - please. Hurry."

Gaius nods. "Go on to Arthur. Always be by his side and never move away."

Merlin's mouth opens and closes until - "You just said that."

"Yes. Whatever he does, don't give into it. He'll have your head on a plate if he finds out about the potion and everything."

"What will we tell him?"

"We'll figure something out. Now go!"

Gaius shoos Merlin towards the exit with a dapper wave of the hand.


	5. Chapter 5

### Chapter 5

 

Merlin never leaves Arthurs side the next days. And Arthur's not complaining - he even wants Merlin to be there.

"How long will this love potion stay in his veins?" Merlin muttered to Gaius one day in a meeting.

"I don't know" Gaius whispered back.

This answer made Merlin want to drown himself. It had been two weeks, two freaking weeks and Arthur doesn't show just a sign of not-loving Merlin.

Or however you may put it.

"Don't  you appreciate how much nicer he is to you?" Gaius asked after a few minutes of silence, while the King, his son and his consultants discussed whether and how they could make the taxes higher.

Arthur just said it wasn't a very good idea to take more than one needs, as Merlin responded: "It is just not Arthur. It is the potion that treats me better and not him."

"Boy, if you didn't make such a serious face, I would think that you're joking."

"What? Why would I? He doesn't love me. Never, ever did."

Gaius didn't answer. He just smiled.

 

"Merlin, would you please pass me the salt?" Arthur asks with a gentle smile. Merlin reaches out for the salt and passes it over.

"Thank you, Darling."

Slowly Merlin gets used to all the nicknames Arthur gives him. Not that he thinks they're cute - he would never think that.

"What are you doing today?"

"Working."

"Why don't you take a day off and spent it with me?" How unabashed he says that. He doesn't even blush.

"I don't want to disobey my duties?" Merlin asks with a fake regretting smile.

"Oh, you won't." Arthur smiles a crooked smile.

Merlin considers it. Weighs the advantages and disadvantages. And then he figures it is the best for everyone if he stays here.

"Well, then. I'll do it."

Arthur claps one's hands like a little kid does when it gets candy for free.

"Come here."

Merlin does what his Prince bids.

"That's the spirit!" Arthur grins and stroke Merlin's hair.

Merlin begins to feel like a dog. At least Arthur doesn't say things like 'Well done' or 'Here's your treat'. The latter wouldn't be so pleasant.

"What's going on in your beautiful mind?" Arthur asks while stroking Merlin's hair.

"Nothing. Nothing, really." he adds at the suspicious glance in Arthur's eyes.

"If you say so." _You know it best._

Merlin can't remember when they started talking. He remembers the quiet. A peaceful quiet, without worries, him, just sitting there and being watched by Arthur, slowly leaning at his friend's body. They stayed like that for a hell of a long time.

They talked a lot. About this and that, getting to know each other.

Then, eventually, Arthur gets tired and falls asleep just there, his arm wrapped around Merlins waist, not letting him go, not even in his sleep

And so it happens, that Merlin stays there the whole night.

In the back of his head, a voice reminds him, that this isn't real, that he could never be loved by someone this hard, that he isn't loved right now. That maybe, Arthur would wake up with him in his arms the very next morning and push him away. The feelings would be gone.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this took me so much longer than I thought because I had to figure out a way to get to an end.  
> I didn't plan to make this more than maybe 15 chapters long but now it appears to become much longer than that ... well.  
> Hope you can forgive me for updating so late, I got 6 chapters for you that I will upload in the next 2 days:) Think it will be a 'reading night' at one of those XD

### Chapter 6

 

Merlin groans.

He really fell asleep on Arthur's lap.

 _Unbelievable_.

Gently, Merlin pushes himself off Arthur, on the one hand trying to escape his loose hug, but on the other hand trying not to wake him up.

This is hell of a hard work. _Bloody hell_.

Finally, he figures out a way to do so.

"Merlin ..." Arthur murmurs. "What are you ..." Merlin, who just freezes in the movement, stares at Arthur's appearance with horror.

Just to notice, that Arthur fell to sleep once again.

Merlin's head turned, he says "Oh well" and skulks off.

 

He enters the chamber.

Gaius stands there at the table and mixes some herbs to a mixture.

"Is the potion ready?" Merlin asks, impatience resonating in his voice.

"No." Gaius denies.

"When will it be ready?"

"When it's ready, it's ready, boy. Now get back to Arthur, would you?"

_I would like to be in my own bed now and not buzzing around some prince who drank some love potion falling in love with no other than me. It just figures that it's me who has to pay for others mistakes._

Instead of speaking his mind aloud, Merlin nods.

"Why are you still standing there, boy?"

"Will this ever end?"

Gaius stops stirring his mixture and turns to Merlin, frowning.

"Will what end?"

"That I have to ..." he stops. _What a stupid and selfish thought_ he thinks.

"That you have to what?"

Gaius comes nearer, cocking his head.

Merlin forms his hands to fists and opens them.

"That I have to pay for being me."

"Merlin. You don't have to pay for anything. This is just what life's like. Do you think I mix potions for fun? It's because I am destined to do so. And you are destined to fulfill your propose as is everyone else in the world."

"Can't one choose his destiny?" Merlin asks, his voice trembling with agony of mind.

"Yes. But what is destiny in a world full of magic and prophecies that fulfill themselves?" Gaius laughs.

 _If that is so_ Merlin thinks _I believe it is time to write my prophecy myself_ but doesn't speak his mind aloud yet again.

"I'll get to Arthur. He might be already waiting for me."

Gaius nods smiling and Merlin leaves for Arthur.

 

"Merlin. Wanna go outside riding a bit?"Arthur asks already awaiting him.

"Yeah, sure." he replies.

Merlin just had no idea what Arthur was up to.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to announce a huge thank you to all the ones who read and liked this story! It's so much fun writing it and I hope I can upload more in the next week. I'll make it somehow :)  
> Plus, I would like to wish all of the ones who celebrate it, a belated Merry Christmas! Hope you spent some time with your family and got some nice presents :D  
> Originally, I wanted to finish this story until 2017 so I can move on with some other stuff I have in mind ... whatsoever, have a great time reading this and leave a comment, please. I always love to get some feedback and it doesn't matter if it's positive or negative.

### Chapter 7

 

They saddled their horses, mounted them and then rode up and away.

The day was warm. Birds were twittering in the trees and the foliage rustled in the wind. It was peaceful.

Once, a hare crossed their ways, but Arthur had no weapon with him to shoot it, also, he didn't want to.

They rode a little slower and watched it hobbling into the wood, its scut bobbing up and down.

"This is nice." Arthur says. They found a spot where to lie and have a break from riding. Now they sat under a big old tree, watching the sky and the wood. Sometimes they drew the other one's attention to a squirrel, making its way to the treetop.

"Indeed, it is" Merlin replies, his eyes fixed on another squirrel climbing up the tree.

"Merlin I ..."

"Yes?"

"I like you a lot. And I was wondering ... if you did that, too."

Merlin stares at Arthur. For some reason, his heart's beating like he was running a marathon and his chest's lifting and lowering like he was breathing fast.

What, eventually, he did.

"Well, Arthur, I- I see you as a friend, a good friend. And I like you."

The silence is absolute.

"Well .. couldn't expect more, could I?"

Merlin smiles secretly.

"I do like you, Arthur. As a friend. And soon, you will do that, too."

"What is that supposed to mean."

"Just say your overwhelmed affection to me will soon end." Arthur makes a questioning face. "And yes, you cannot understand this." Arthur lifts his arms. "Just ... forget it."

"Alright." Arthur puts a wine grape in his mouth, smirks and begins to chew it.

The look of it makes Merlin laugh so hard he can barely stop.

"What?" Arthur says with a full mouth. "Not like you haven't seen me eatin' ever in your life, huh?"

Merlin presses his lips together, trying to suppress the urge to laugh while accidently letting some laughers trough.

"Merlin. I won't have you laughing at me!" Arthur shouts.

Actually, he isn't exactly serious.

And maybe he's laughing, too.

Just maybe.

 

"This was a nice trip, wasn't it?" Arthur says to Merlin as they are on their way back to the castle.

"Yeah, sure."

"We should have this more often."

Merlin looks at Arthur, thinking of what he might've said, what might've happened today if that potion wouldn't be.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK, the fun is kinda draining away from the story now. Some of you might've already noticed this.  
> Don't worry, it will definitely come back and still be there but hidden and more serious than at the beginning.  
> This is all because of the development of the story, things become more serious now and Merlin must face the fact that Arthur won't be treating him like this forever.  
> Hope you enjoy anyway.

### Chapter 8

 

"Gaius. May I talk to you?" Merlin asks closing the door shut.

His tutor puts the vial down he holds in his hands and walks toward Merlin.

"Yes, Merlin. How was the trip with Arthur?"

"It was nice."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, it was."

Silence appears and encases them.

"Go on, boy. Tell me." Gaius pushes Merlin to talk to him.

"I was wondering if you could tell me more about this potion I gave Arthur. The love potion."

Gaius sights.

"Please, Gaius. I need to know."

The elder man sits down on his stool and looks around in discomfort that makes Merlin wish he just didn't ask. "It makes the one who drinks it fall in love with the first person they meet."

"Is this all?"

Gaius' eyes shine in a curious way.

"Yes."

"Are you sure? Because if it is so, all we need is the remedy and then all will be back to normal."

"Would you like it to get back to normal?"

"Yes, of course! I wouldn't want Arthur to be someone he isn't. That'll be unfair."

"Merlin." Gaius says suddenly severe. "The Arthur now is the same one as always. He just feels a little different for you. That's all."

"So .. what you are trying to say is that Arthur normally hates me to hell and back?"

"No. I just want to say that love changes people in their actions, not their mind. Now that he loves you, he can't bear seeing you scrubbing the floor. He won't let anyone harm you.

"Well besides the scrubbing I do more. And now I have to do all that plus babysit Arthur."

"Merlin he is your prince and your future king."

  _Well. That tone wasn't pleased_ Merlin thinks. Even though he says: "And my destiny. There is a list of who I should be. If anyone gets hurt or is in trouble or if a love potion is spoken over anyone people actually help, you know? But it's been two weeks and nothing's changed. Where is the remedy? Oh, excuse me, you have a lot more to do. It's just Merlin."

"You should hear yourself, Merlin. I'm doing as fast as I can! And you are right, I have other things to do. I got a lot of work from the king and he isn't pleased either with my work. Uh. I think I am getting old." Gaius grasped his back.

Immediately, Merlin regrets his words.

"Sorry Gaius. I know, you're giving your best. I just can't stand it anymore. Arthur said he liked me a lot. _A lot._ And I think he wants me to feel so, too."

"That changes the situation. What did you say?"

"I said I liked him too but just as a friend. And that he will soon do that, too. Then he asked for the meaning of my words."

"And?"

"I said his 'overwhelmed affection to me will soon end'."

"Was he mad?"

"No, we ended up laughing together. Or something like that ... I don't know."

Merlin realizes, that even if the things he experienced today weren't real, he wants to keep them to himself.

For the very reason that once all this has ended ...  when Arthur is back to normal, the memories will be everything he has left.


	9. Chapter 9

### Chapter 9

 

Merlin runs as fast as he possibly can.

The time he reaches his goal, he gasps. "Silly catacombs..." he murmurs and holds his skull. "No fun running down here ..."

He emerges out of the archway.  
"Kilgharrah! I _need_ your help!"

"Yes, Merlin. How can I help." The silent smirk on the Dragons face shows how **pleased** the Dragon is to see Merlin again. "I am very lonely down here. A shame, that you only pay me a visit when you want something from me."

Merlin laughs. "Would you want me to pay you any visits?"

"If that's what you ask ... no, not really."

"See?"

"What is the reason for your coming, then?"

Merlin didn't dare to look directly at the dragons face while he responds. "It's Arthur. I accidently gave him a love potion, and now he is in love. With me."

Kilgharrah lets out a huge laugh that continues many more moments than Merlin thinks he has left.

"There is not much time!" Merlin tries to make the Dragon listen to him.

"Alright .. hahaha... alright ... I-I just ... sorry. It's difficult to keep a laugher in. You know, the first time you visited me, you told me, you would help to kill Arthur. And now you always want me to give you some tips how you should save him. But you never asked me to save ... you."

"I don't ask you to save me! I ask you to save Arthur! I don't want him to have to live like this!"

"So you say that loving you is a bad thing?"

"No, I wasn't saying this. I - just help me already!"

"Fine. I'll help you. Make a remedy and give it to Arthur, any way possible. And after you did that, he will be the old Arthur you obviously miss so much."

"Wow. That-that wasn't a riddle." Merlin says, surprised by the simplicity of Kilgharrah's words.

"Because it is so easy! I wonder why you couldn't think of this yourself."

"No! I-I did! And Gaius already makes the remedy!"

"Then what did you come here for?"

"For help. Arthur isn't the same and he does crazy stuff he's never done before."

The golden Dragon cocks his head. "What would that be?"

"So, on the one hand, he is nice. NICE! _Arthur_. And he treats Gwen like he's never liked her. You know what I mean with like - right?" The Dragon cocks his head a little further to the side. "W-whatever. And get that! He even rode out with me!"

"Like a whole new person." Kilgharrah notices. He seems to be a little absent.

"Yeah! Does love do that? Change people?"

"Of course. You know that. And Arthur just changed for you. Everyone else is treated the same. Except this Gwen of course." He giggles.

"He needs to change back."

"But you fear what might happen then."

Merlin comments this with a reluctant nod. "Yes."

"Merlin. Every one of us must face the truth in due time. And nothing can escape the truth."

" _And destiny_." They say in unison.

"I wish you the best of luck in your dilemma. May I see you again."

"In due time." Merlin murmurs, but the Dragon is already gone.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi :)  
> Me again. I know it was long and I am truly sorry for that. I read dozen of books, had a mass of homework to do and wrote plenty of class tests. But it is all behind me (for now) so I have time to write.  
> Enjoy as always and have a good day :D

### Chapter 10

 

Merlin was insecure what he should do next. The dragon spoke in riddles at the end but it wasn't a difficult one. At least Merlin thought so.

Now he worries his brain about the words of the dragon and can't manage to get to a solution.

No one can escape the truth ... does this mean Merlin must tell Arthur about the potion? That his feelings for him are not real? Arthur wouldn't believe a single word.

Is it destiny? That Arthur drank the potion? That Merlin must tell Arthur about the potion? Or that it all has to end? That the remedy must be given to Arthur?

His head hurts from all the questions buzzing in it.

He wants this to end. It just has to end!

What happened to him? He used to joke, he used to laugh and now? He feels not good enough, not loved enough. Arthur may never have loved him without that stupid potion! And Merlin would never have had those thoughts, those stupid thoughts he does not need in his head!

Oh, if there is a god, why wouldn't he save him? Why would he spin his destiny to be like that?

The potion needs to be given. Merlin is certain of it now. Whatever it costs, Arthur needs to be normal again. Maybe, if Arthur was back to normal, all these stupid questions would stop buzzing and Merlin could live his life in peace.

Merlin storms into the chamber and runs right up to Gaius.

"I need the remedy! Now."

"For god's sake, Merlin. What happened to you, boy? Sit down a bit."

"I don't wanna sit down. I want it to end, Gaius, so bad, it needs to end!"

"Calm down, please. The remedy needs a little more time, if you'd go back to Arthur -"

"Arthur, Arthur, Arthur! I need the remedy, I can't stand him flirting with me all the time. It's not him, Gaius, I need him to be Arthur again. Please."

Merlin never felt so broken in his life. This isn't him at all. He has no wit in him. Maybe he had one time.

But those times are over.

"Merlin. If you don't want to go back to Arthur, go in your room. Tidy it up and when you're done, come back here and the remedy will be done. I promise."

Merlin nods. The anger and the hopelessness leaves him suddenly and leave shame and a weird kind of tiredness and sadness behind.

"I will. Gaius, I am sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. It wasn't fair."

"It's alright, boy. Now go."

And Merlin goes.


	11. Chapter 11

### Chapter 11

 

The room is clean.

Finally.

Merlin happily sits down on the floor.

Only a few seconds later, he jumps.

The remedy! the thought shootsthrough Merlin's brain like a lightning.

He bolts out of the room, right into Gaius' arms.

"Merlin. Here you are. I was about to enter your room."

"Do you have the remedy?"

"I do. How will you give it to Arthur?"

"I'll share a drink with him. I'll bring two chalices. In the golden one there will be no cure and in the silver there will be."

"Arthur wouldn't drink out of the silver one. He is too proud to do so."

"That's exactly why I'll give the golden one to him. He is so in love that he'll insist on me drinking out of the golden one." Merlin gazes into space. "I already dread his corny comment."

Gaius makes a pitying face.  "Take the remedy. And give it to Arthur."

 

Moments later Merlin walks with two chalices on a tablet through the halls.

The remedy he got, too. Just before Arthur's room, he opens the vial and pours its contents into the silver chalice.

Then he enters the room.

"Sunshine! What are you bringing?" Arthur asks rubbing his hands.

He steps further, smiling.

Such a sweet smile. And that for Merlin. That it's not real and can't be meant for him, hurts Merlin the most, so he looks away really fast.

"Drinks! I'd love to share these with you." Merlin tries to be persuasive, his eyes still fixed on the ground.

Arthur lifts Merlins head, still smiling. Immediately, Merlins heart jumps.

"Thank you, love." Arthur takes the golden chalice that Merlin hands him, then looks over to his heartthrob.

"Why don't you have a golden one?" he wonders.

"They didn't have any left, somehow. I don't know." Merlin answers.

"I want you to drink out of the golden one."

Bingo. Merlin's plan bears fruit.

"Oh - no. I can't."

"Yes, you can. I insist."

It's going like clockwork.

Merlin admits the defeat with a small smile.

"Well then ..." Merlin upholds the chalice, ".. on us."

"On us." Arthur repeats and drinks.

He smiles and not a seconds later he falls on the floor.

"Arthur!" Merlin shouts at the top of his lounges.

What happened?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, It's short again, sorry. I tried to make it longer than the last one, which I did, but it's only a few lines longer. 10 or so. More will follow soon :) What do you think happened to Arthur? Will he be OK?


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally finished! Yay! And it's extra-long today :) Hope you enjoy! Please give me some feedback maybe about my writing style or so, so I can improve it! Thank you :)

### Chapter 12

 

Seized with panic, Merlin shakes his prince by his shoulders. "Wake up you prat, wake up!"

Arthur groans and opens his eyes, then nictitates and groans again.

"Arthur! Are you OK?" Merlin asks with a trembling voice.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine I think ... my head aches. I think I got a migraine. Uh. And I got this really _weird_ dream ... I was somehow in love with you and we rode out together and I gave you free time and I tried to kiss you but we were interrupted and I hugged you ... then we shared a drink and well ... the  I woke up."

"Haha, ha ... silly dream, huh?" Merlin says while he hides the chalices behind his back.

"Yeah, pretty wired." Arthur says, then his eyes widen. "Hey, what'ya hiding behind your back?"

"N-nothing!"

"I can tell when you lie, you know that? Show it to me, will you?"

"It really-"

"Merlin."

Merlin looks away, just to look at Arthur again, his face a poker face and his eyes convincing. "I am not lying to you."

"Yeah, right, I don't believe you, show it to me. Merlin. NOW." Arthur stretches out a hand.

Merlin shakes his head.

"Merlin."

He shakes it again, harder this time.

" _Merlin._ "

They have a staring contest. Guess who won.

"Alright, alright, but don't kill me."

Arthur raises his eyebrow. "Just if you give me a reason."

"Promise you won't."

"Don't be such a child, Merlin." Merlin presses his lips together so they form a small line. "Alright, alright, I'll do it! I promise, I won't harm you or kill you or whatever."

"Good. Well ... you ... God, no, no. I can't, I just can't."

"Are you a girl?"

"Is this a serious question?"

"For god's sake ... Merlin, don't put on such a show, you're behaving like a princess-" Merlin 's heart jumps "...and I can't have that. OK? So just stop jerking around and show what's behind your back, it cannot be that awful."

_If he only knew ..._

"Fine. It's this." And he shows the chalices to Arthur.

"A-am I hallucinating? I see two chalices, what do you see?" Arthur blinks twice. "I still see them, I might be sick. Am - terribly."

"That reminds me of where it all began ..." Merlin says.

"Can you just pinch me or something, because I think I might still be asleep."

"You're not asleep. Not anymore. And I think you passed out, you didn't fall asleep."

Now it is Arthur's turn to shake his head. "Can you just explain what happened here? I am freaking out, because if all of it was true, I am so done." He takes a seat, exhausted and stressed.

"Who's the girl, now." Merlin mumbles while sitting down next to Arthur.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing, I said nothing. I'll explain everything, just lean back." But Arthur sits still, his body strained and not moving. Merlin sighs. _This will be a long day_ he thinks. "Let's get on with this ... where do I start ..."

 

"And then you drank out of the chalice and just fell down the floor. And then you woke up and now we are here."

Arthur has a weird look on his face. Is he disgusted? Or worried? Maybe fearful?

"What is it?"

"If I hear one 'and then' from you again, I am gonna throw up."

"OK."

It is quiet.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Merlin asks cautiously.

"No, not really. You know what? I have some good news for you." He smiles bright and looks straight into Merlin's eyes.

For a moment, Merlin thinks it's going to be OK. Everything would be good, they would continue like this. Or no - he doesn't want that. Why would he? Arthur needs to be the old Arthur again.

_But do you want that?_ A tiny voice asks in the back of his head. _Do you really want things to get back to normal? Don't you want Arthur to take your hand and say he loved you all along?_

No, of course not. I don't feel for him - or guys - that way. Why would I?

"So?" Merlin asks.

"Whatever this was - it's not real. I don't have these kinda feelings for you."

_So, if you don't like him that way_ ... the little voice asked _Why does this hurt so much?_

But Arthur goes one better.

"And this isn't everything. On top of that, I need you to clean my room, polish my armor, brush the horses, cook me some dinner for two, 'cause I gotta make it up to Gwen, and then sew my clothes. Some seam has opened."

After his speech, Arthur stands up on his feet and adds that Merlin shall leave his room now, because he wants to change.

Merlin walks out, chocked, barely able to move.

_Like I said - why does this hurt so much?_ The voice pipes up again.

Merlin doesn't have the strength to put her in her place. He can barely walk.

And walking was all he would do this day.


	13. Chapter 13

### Chapter 13

 

Merlins back hurts. Seriously, what's the point in scrubbing all the floors and buttons when they get dirty again anyways after the cleaning's done.

 _Silly thought!_ Merlin scold himself. _There's a point in cleaning things. After the cleaning, they look better and it smells better - most of the times - and it's just ... cleaner?_

OK, Merlin did this cleaning-thing for so long now, he cannot come up with convincing arguments why he should continue.

Except for one. Arthur.

That guy just went crazy, literally insane. He gives Merlin more tasks than he ever had to fulfill in his whole time as the manservant of the prince of Camelot.

Does he regret giving Arthur the remedy?

Maybe.

Does he want the potion-Arthur back?

Not at all.

Does he want the old Arthur back?

You couldn't be more right.

In addition to that, Arthur does mindless stuff. He fights more fights in the arena than ever. Buts that's not everything - he even plans on marrying Gwen. Well, he doesn't want her as his official fiancé yet but hey - he talked about it with her, talked about a family and in which way this was possible.

Beautiful Gwen. She was so happy when Arthur came back to her and told her he loved her.

On the whole, Merlin is worried.

Arthur needs to stop to dash into every (mostly legal) fight he can find and start using his energy for different skills.

Like talking to Merlin. Uh - _people_ of course.

Because every time _someone_ tries to talk to him, he backs away or starts barking some orders at _someone_.

He must stop doing this. And - why does he do it? Of course, Arthur's angry and feels humiliated, in the truest sense of the word.

 

"Arthur?"

"Leave me alone, Merlin. I don't wanna talk to you." Arthur's steps speed up.

"If you'd listen to me for one second! Please Arthur!"

Arthur turns around and for a tiny winy second Merlin thinks he'ss finally breaking through the ice. Then he sees Arthur's face.

A mask of ungovernable ire and hatred, beneath a bit of vulnerability makes Merlin cringe.

"No, you listen! I made a big, big fool out of me when I court you. OK? Don't make it worse."

"I understand that you're angry, but it wasn't my fault! I had the wrong potion, I didn't mean anything of this to happen. I hated the way you treated me back there! But that's not what I wanted to talk to you about."

"But it did happen, didn't it?" Arthur asks furiously.

Merlin tries to say something but Arthur cuts him off.

"I don't wanna hear it. Get away from here and don't forget to clean whatever there is to clean. Maybe your own room for a change."

With those words Arthur walkes away, leaving a speechless Merlin behind who can't believe his ears.

 

"Gaius? I have to talk to you." Merlin says entering the chamber.

"Yes , Merlin? What's on your mind?"

Merlin sits down on the chair. He takes some time to reply.

"It's Arthur." he finally says.

"The remedy did work, didn't it?"

"Yes. But I fear a little too good."

"What are you referring to?" Gaius stood in front of Merlin, now he's taking a seat as well.

Merlin shakes his head.

"He used to be in love with me. But now it's the complete opposite."

Silence.

"I think he hates me."


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi :)  
> I know, I know, it's been long again. I was sick for a long time.  
> But now I feel better so I wrote this chapter. It's really long, actually, twice as long as the first Chapter.  
> Hope you like it, because you had to wait so long, I'll try to upload maybe one or two more Chapters today.  
> Until them, I hope you enjoy!

### Chapter 14

 

The weeks go by and nothing changes. Merlin begins to think that Arthur is up to killing himself in relation to all the fights he takes. Every time he comes back wounded and it freaking hurts Merlins heart to see his friend like this.

His friend.

A weird thing to say now, after all this time.

Merlin spends his nights to weight the chances that Arthur still thinks of him as a friend, too, other than a traitor.

The way he pushed him away back there, not physically but mentally  ... Merlin never felt more hurt than in that moment.

He should've known. Should've left it the way it was.

Merlin feels sudden range glow through his body. It eats at his lungs, his chest, his heart and through him all the way to his toes.

What is he even thinking? It's not like this is his fault. Actually, it is Gaius' and Arthur's fault. And on top of that, he never did anything to make Arthur feel bad for, now, did he?

The love potion was Gaius' fault. And he didn't use the situation Arthur and he were in. So what right does Arthur have to be mad at him?

He didn't even like what Arthur tried to make him do, didn't like the hugs and didn't like the smiles and the attention he got. He didn't like that Arthur got up early and that he couldn't wake him anymore and that he couldn't get those kill-looks no more or get told that Dragons can speak and animals can't. That he couldn't remind Arthur that Dragons are animals, too.

He didn't ask for anything like that to happen.

It is so not-fair that he has to pay for it now. Pay for an accident.

He gotta talk to Arthur one more time. He has to. And if that doesn't work, he will leave Camelot. He will leave. He will.

Because he cannot live like this anymore.

 

"Arthur is such a gentlemen, you know?"

"Huh-hm."

"And he talks about kids. Kids! Can you imagine?"

"Huh-hm."

"It kinda annoys me that he always fights so much. Do you know the reason?"

"Huh-hm."

"Well, then. Tell me."

"Huh-hm."

"Merlin?" Gwen quits brushing the floor and looks at Merlin who piles the apples in the bowl for about the twentieth time today. "Are you even listening?"

"Huh-hm."

"Well, you're obviously not. You seem oddly off today."

"Huh-hm."

This is exactly the time Gwen decides to take the apples - plus the bowl - away from Merlin. Instead of letting out a cry of protest, Merlin lets out another "Huh-hm" and sets his head on the table.

"What is _wrong_ with you," Gwen demands to know.

"Huh-hm."

Now Gwen lets out a little sight and places her hands in the hip.

"MERLIN!" This is Arthur's voice. "DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO CLEAN MY ROOM!"

No second after this announcement, Merlin tries to stand up. He is aware that he looks a little back-from-the-dead, walking forward with stiff legs and arms, his head bouncing.

"Merlin, what are you doing?" Gwen asks, fear underlies her voice. "Merlin?" she asks again, more demanding this time.

"Huh-hm."

"This can't be good." Gwen says.

All of a sudden, Arthur runs into the room, his head red. His gaze remains at Merlin. "What did I tell you? Didn't you hear me?"

Merlin looks at Arthur. Instead of making "Huh-hm" again, he's quiet. He can't get himself to say anything at all.

"Are you deaf? I asked you a question!"

"Arthur, stop it, please. Can't you see that he's not feeling well?"

This is the first time Arthur recognizes Gwen. He lets out a loud, hysterical laugh.

"Yeah, yeah I see. I see enough." He sends Merlin a pejorative look. "You really have no self-respect at all, have you?"

"What is that supposed to mean," Gwen asks. "Let him rest, Arthur, from the looks of it he's been running around all morning."

Arthur takes a closer look at Merlin. Merlin is swinging back and forth, he notices.

"Whatever. Get him in bed. Tomorrow, he needs to work, though."

 

"What is that between you two?" Gwen asks as she pulls up the blanket, so Merlin is all comfy and cozy.

"I don't ... I don't wanna talk about it."

Merlin feels Gwen's gaze for a long time. Then she says: "Fine. You'll figure it out by yourself, then."

Merlin doesn't answer. Gwen talking about Arthur pulled him down. He felt utterly weak, like a huge weigh was put at his shoulders. He would make this weigh disappear again.

He planned on talking to Arthur. He didn't, yet. Not exactly. He'd try tomorrow.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, the 15th chapter. I know it seems short, but it is an improtant part of the story (you'll see) and I didn't think it needed to be longer. Merlin talks much and it just looks like few but actually in word his "speech" is really long. About 10 lines if you put it all together. Please let me know what you think!

### Chapter 15

 

"Arthur."

"Merlin."

Silence. Awkward, stupid silence.

"You know I am only here because Gwen told me she'd never talk to me again if we didn't fix this."

Uh, Gwen. Of course. Maybe Merlin thought there was another reason why Arthur would visit him, maybe even because he was sick of this whole situation and wants to wipe the slate clean.

"Huh. I thought she wanted us to figure it out ourselves."

Disbelieve spreads on Arthur's face. "You told her?"

"She wanted me to, but I didn't. I wouldn't, OK?"

"Fine. Start talking. That's what you wanted to do, right? So talk."

Immediately, Merlin's head is wiped clean. The is nothing. Nothing to say to him. Arthur waits.

"Right," he gets himself to say. He awkwardly cleans his throat. Doesn't change much tough. Things are already awkward enough. He needed some time to collect himself, then he continued.

"So. That day you weren't feeling well, I asked Gaius for a potion. He grumbled something and gave me one, which happened to be a love potion. I wasn't curious about it - I didn't even know it was a love potion, I swear - and just gave it to you because I thought it was the right one. The next day you were completely different. You started to do weird stuff I didn't like. At the beginning it was kinda great, though. No hitting, no shouting. But you didn't let me work. I had to be around you all the time. That wasn't great at all. So if you think that I enjoyed seeing you like this - I didn't. I pushed Gaius to make a remedy, to solve this. To bring the old Arthur back." Merlin pauses for a moment, lets the words sink in.

After a while, Arthur nods. "Continue."

"But after I gave you the remedy, it was - is - like you hate me. I hate the way it is now. Why do you do that? Why do you throw yourself in those stupid fights? Are you embarrassed? I understand. Are you angry? OK. But don't be angry with me, I don't deserve it. I did nothing wrong back there. You always wanted me around you. I didn't force you to hug me or whatever. If I wanted to, I could've easily done everything you wanted." He stops. Something in Arthurs expression changed. He seems angry, but not angry with Merlin. Embarrassed, too. He somehow looks like a drowned rat.

"I'm sorry," Arthur says completely out of the blue. "But I won't stop the fighting. It helps me deal with things."

"But you'll kill yourself!" Merlin can't believe it. Sooner or later, Arthur will get killed. He must see that for himself. Unless ... unless he doesn't care. Why would he put his life in such danger?

Arthur shrugs. "Yeah, whatever. I gotta go. Thanks for cleaning the air, though. I truly am sorry for ... for the past few weeks. The way I acted -- it wasn't fair," he says.

Then he slips through the door.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter for today.  
> Please let me know what you think :)  
> I hope you enjoy.

### Chapter 16

 

Gaius came in short after Arthur left.

"You two alright?" he asks, taking a seat at the end of Merlin's bed.

He rather would take a nap than having anyone asking if he was alright and wanting to talk to him. The little chat there with Arthur exhausted him.

"Yeah, I think we are," Merlin responds, feeling the warmth of the bed already taking him away.

There is a lulling silence and Merlin starts drifting away.

"How are you feeling?" The question brings Merlin back to reality.

"Exhausted and tired."

"Then I probably let you sleep."

"No. No, what did you wanna tell me?" Merlin tries to sit up to emphasize his words but his arms won't let him. Sleep already got him in an iron grip and pulls him away.

"It's fine. Get some sleep. We can talk afterwards."

Merlin nods with a frown and lets himself sink back.

 

In his dream, lightning divides the blue sky.

The colors are intense, surreal and somehow dreadful. He stands on flat land, his clothes are dirty and wet from the rain. He can't run, nor hide.

"Hello?" he tries to scream but no word escapes his mouth.

He feels like standing there for hours, always fearing a lightning to hit him, turn him into nothing but ashes. The air is pure electricity.

His screams are mute.

Then the lightning stops. The sun comes out and dunks the place in light, changes it to a green meadow.

It's peaceful. It feels homelike. Merlin feels being pulled up towards the sky. Just as the sun fills out his visual field, he wakes up.

 

"You're awake."

Gaius still sits there.

"Yeah. Have you been here all along?" Merlin rubs his head. Sleepily he blinks in the light that breaks through the window.

"Yes. I needed to be here when you wake up."

"What did you want to tell me earlier? It seems to be very important," Merlin interprets.

Gaius chuckles. This is the moment, Merlin knows he's right. "What gives you the idea?"

"You wouldn't have waited here next to me. You're half asleep."

"True."

Nailed it.

"Well?"

"I didn't tell you the whole truth."

Merlin is taken aback. "What? What are you talking about?"

"Well, about the love potion. The way it works. Before you interrupt-" Merlin closes his mouth "- let me explain. I made the love potion for a man in the city who wanted to know if his wife was still in love with him or had feelings for him."

"With a love potion," Merlin couldn't help but say.

"With a love potion. Well, that is because the love potion, especially this one, only works, if the person who drinks the potion already has feelings for the one who gives the potion to them. Which means-"

"-which means Arthur's in love with me."

"Has feelings for you, yes."

Merlin feels like he's been punched in the gut. This was beyond funny.

"What is this - a stupid game? Why do I get thrown in hell, tugged out of it and right thrown back in?"

"I'm sorry, Merlin. But I thought this could explain why Arthur is doing this. Imagine. He has feelings for you, doesn't want to have some for you and hides them. Then there is this stupid love potion that turns it all around - everyone has seen you two acting like lovebirds. He _court_ you, Merlin. If someone found out that he has feelings for you, it would have turned everything around. Maybe this scared him so much he wanted to make sure no one got the idea."

This makes bloody sense. Still - "Why does this always happen to me."

Gaius laughs. "Seems like you are a sort of attraction for stuff like this, huh?"

"Funny," Merlin says, his mouth is serious but his eyes smile.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a new chapter for you, I hope you like it, it's also a little longer this time. I was so motivated to write!  
> Thank all of you for your amazing support, that means a lot to me :)  
> Feel free to comment or suggest how the story continues!

### Chapter 17

 

Life is a difficult piece of shit.

Merlin never thought of life like a present someone gives to you on your birthday. You don't choose to live. You just get put in a position you may not even wanna be in.

Unfair and senseless.

If kings are kings because they were born to be kings, not because they make a good job at being one but just are kings because some stupid bloodline made them, you know things are going to be bad.

But Arthur ain't that way. He is a good king.

Merlin is sure about that one.

And if he destroys Arthur's destiny by simply existing, he does no one no good.

Speaking of Arthur - he hasn't changed.

OK, he treats Merlin better now, but let's put that one aside. He still takes every chance to get in a fight he gets and it freaking breaks Merlin's heart.

Slowly, Merlin walks towards the door, struggling whether to do it or not.

Merlin thinks that if nothing changes - of course he'll do everything he can to change Arthur's condition - he will leave.

It's his destiny to make Arthur king, right? So if Arthur can only be king without him, Merlin has to leave, right?

Someway Merlin thinks someone say "no" but every time he considers to go, no one does.

He inhales and exhales deeply, then pushes the door open.

The room is a little messy, clothes lying around with blood stains on them. Bandages lie on the floor, also they have blood on them.

On the bed lies Arthur, eyes open and steady breathing. If there wasn't the dark red spot on his side where the bandage couldn't stop the blood from getting through, it may look like he's just lying there taking a rest to think or something.

Since there is a red spot, it's clear he's not taking a rest because he wants to - he has to.

"What are you waiting for? Come in."

Arthur sounds exhausted and also frustrated. Maybe because he didn't get the chance to die. Or he just wants Merlin to leave again.

"How are you?" Merlin asks stepping to the bed.

"I'm freezing - you forgot to close the door."

"Sorry." Hastily Merlin closes the door and then goes back to the bed.

"How are you feeling now?" Merlin implies a smirk.

"Warmer."

"I mean your wound."

"I know."

Arthur sights.

A while none of them says a word.

"You don't have to worry about me," Arthur looks strangely at Merlin. "I'm-"

"For sure. I know I don't have to worry, but I do. You're killing yourself and you know it. Is that your whole plan? Do you wanna get killed so I feel worse of what - what the potion did? Do you want me to -"

"Slim it. I don't want you to do anything apart from cleaning. Whatever it is."

"So you really wanna get killed." Merlin never was so disappointed by someone.

Arthur snorts. "I never said that."

"No answer is an answer."

Arthur shakes his head. "When have you become so complicated?"

"Think of the consequences! What will this land be without you? What will everyone do?"

"I am thinking, believe me!"

Merlin hasn't recognized that both of their voices reached a high volume and they moved towards each other - until now. They are so close, he can feel Arthur's breath, his _words_ against his skin.

"I am thinking about everything since I came back to myself, am thinking of what people think about me. What ... you are thinking about me."

"I am thinking you're a prat. And I think you shouldn't kill yourself because your land needs you."

Abruptly Arthur leans back against the pillows. His face is hollow and pale, somehow he looks years older, dull and more exhausted than at the beginning of their conversation.

"You say the land needs me. But you don't you don't say," Arthur's eyes are like a looking glass which reflects all the distress he's felt in the past few weeks, "that you need me too."

Merlin stares at his friend. Arthur cares what he thinks?


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not completely satisfied with this one but the next will definitely be so much better, this can be seen like a bridge that's necessary for the next step.  
> Hope you enjoy anyway!

### Chapter 18

 

"What are you thinking?"

Merlin shakes his head. "I didn't know you thought about my opinion like this," he says. Arthur never mentioned something like that. Never asked what he thought about things unless he needed to know.

"Well, I never mentioned it. How could you've known?"

The following silence is like a curtain existing in the space between them. It is an unknown and somehow frightening emptiness that cuts him of off Arthur. He feels like if he doesn't fill it, he'll lose him. Lose what they had back when they were still friends and not more or less than that.

"I need you."

The words come out quiet.

"What?" His king's eyes are big. It looks like he cannot take in the words Merlin said, like they're too much what he wished for than what he expected.

"I need you. I need you to be my king."

"Only your king."

Merlin stares. Arthur looks hurt. Not physical but verbal. _Merlin's words hurt him._

"I don't know if I'm ready for you being my friend again, after everything that has happened," Merlin tries to put his feelings into words.

Arthurs expression changes from hurt to something else - resignation.

Oh man he failed.

"Friend. Yeah. I think we'll need some time to go back to friends, won't we."

What does that mean again? He didn't wanna say friends earlier, didn't wanna say that he needed Arthur again as the man he was before this began, as the man he ... loved. And not this Arthur, broken and offended in a row that repeats itself over and over again.

Maybe it has something to do with what Gaius said.

_"Well, about the love potion. The way it works. Before you interrupt-" Merlin closed his mouth "- let me explain. I made the love potion for a man in the city who wanted to know if his wife was still in love with him or had feelings for him."_

_"With a love potion," Merlin couldn't help but say._

_"With a love potion. Well, that is because the love potion, especially this one, only works, if the person who drinks the potion already has feelings for the one who gives the potion to them. Which means-"_

_"-which means Arthur's in love with me."_

_"Has feelings for you, yes."_

Their conversation - if everything was true - then - then Arthur... well, what can he loose.

"I don't want you - I need you to be my king, but also my - more."

Now it's Arthur's turn to stare at Merlin, eyes the size of plates and mandible touching the ground.

"I can't explain it," Merlin says, "but until we know what happened between us - what changed - I want to make sure the kingdom is fine. That you are fine. Before we turn everything upside down." The truth is, he doesn't want to be reasonable. He wants to - gosh, here and now he would - but he can't think it. He can't.

Arthur, who watched him very closely, narrows his eyes and says, "I know what changed. You and I have."


	19. Chapter 19

### Chapter 19

 

Merlin is startled. "What?"

Arthur lets out a sight. "We changed. The world's the same though, don't ya think? What changed is us."

"I don't understand what you mean," Merlin shakes his head.

Arthur groans. "It's easy - just know that you and me are different from the way we were before the love potion. We - I - realized things."

"Things like what?" Merlin already knows the answer but doesn't want to be the one to say it. He can't think it nor say it. So he must hear it, hear it from Arthur himself. Saying it himself would be ... it would make him valuable. And that he doesn't want to be.

He doesn't want to lose a loved one. Being pushed away by someone you love is horrible. You feel like you're not good enough like you don't deserve anyone and cannot deserve anyone. It hurts so much and makes you never want to ask anyone out again. It makes you feel ugly and worthless.

Merlin doesn't want to feel like that.

"Feelings, emotions. I don't refer to you as a friend anymore," Arthur says. Trembling, he draws his breath. "Like you said, as more than that. _I_ want you to be more to me than that."

Merlin can see the willpower written on Arthurs face that's needed to let out this confession. Of course Arthur only draws the outlines that form what Merlin already knows, but still this makes his heart jump for joy. So he isn't nothing to Arthur. He means something to him, much more than a servant he's friends with because time made them. He likes Merlin as a person.

"And I know you feel the same way about me," Arthur adds, "and I also know that we both need time to process everything."

"Time to do what then?" He just needs to hear it like he needs to breathe.

"Be more. If you want us to be more."

Merlin smiles. "I do, you know that."

Then thoughts flood his mind, thoughts of whose he's surprised of that they never have appeared in his mind before.

_What will be when we're together. What will they say. How can what we have survive._

He keeps his thoughts to himself not wanting Arthur to worry and take everything back.

They'll find a way.

Somehow they always do.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing. I just wonder how much time we'll need."

Arthur snickers. "There's no need to worry about that. Sooner or later we'll know."

"Yeah, you're right there."

This time the silence is pure and safe, the curtain has vanished and there is no need to fill the quiet.

Merlin watches while Arthur dozes off, stays there until he hears the steady calm breathes of his ... lover? There's no other word popping into his mind.

No second, no third.

Slowly, Merlin rises, stands there watching Arthur a little longer and then turns around to leave the room.

He closes the door very carefully.

When he turns around, he looks straight into cocoa brown eyes, surrounded by brown skin, the face framed by curly locks.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!  
> I'm so so sorry this took so _long_ , there was loads of work to do.  
> Hope you enjoy :)

### Chapter 20

 

The eyes narrowed.

_Oh shit._

"H-hi Guinevere. How are you?"

"Don't even try, Merlin. I saw it." She raised a brow.

Merlin bit his lower lip. "Saw what?" _Better play dumb then getting caught_ , he thinks.

But Gwen doesn't peg away."Since when?"

"Huh?" Merlin decides that he wants to stick to his plan.

"Don't take me for a fool, Merlin. Since when have you two had feelings for each other? I mean real ones."

 _Stay strong Merlin, you can do this. You. Can. Do. This._ He thinks every word with so much volition he must believe they're true.

"R-real? Feelings? A-are you kidding?"

_Well he failed._

"I heard what you two said. I'm not mad, Merlin, I just wanna know since when." Tears appear in her eyes. "When have I lost him?"

Merlin stares. Probably he should take her in his arms but is afraid she doesn't want it.

"You haven't lost him," was all he can say, "He still belongs to you. T-this is new for me -- for him. Please, Gwen," he dares to touch her arms and as she doesn't back away he holds them in a solid grip. He lowers his voice a bit, makes it softer and put as much empathy in it as he can. "Please, stop crying.."

She did stop and after a few sobs she spoke again. "I always knew. I thought ... It was stupid to think you two wouldn't get together. And in the last few weeks he was so different to me, right after he turned his back at you after this love potion. I -- I don't know what I thought. I'*m sorry I bothered you." She breaks loose. "I better leave."

"No, Gwen! Gwen!"

She stops and turns around.

"I'm sorry. I am."

She smiles slightly. "I know. You can't choose love, can you?"

Merlin laughs. "No, I guess not."

He pauses.

"Can I ask you something?" Merlin asks and then isn't sure if it was right to ask her that. Does he **have** the right to?

"Of course," she smiles.

Merlin breathes in and out, twice. Then he shakes his head. "This isn't appropriate. I shouldn't ask. Sorry."

"No! Do it. I wanna know."

"Well ... what about Lancelot?"

She seems perplexed. "What about him?"

"Weren't you two once a thing? I mean you were in love, weren't you?"

She looks at him with an indefinable look on her face. "Yeah. We were."

"I'm sorry I asked." It's the truth, he is.

"No. It's fine. It really is. I -- I understand. And yes, I still feel something for him."

Her expression gets thoughtful. "Maybe that's the way it's meant to be."

After a short moment remaining face-to-face, they brake up without a word and each one goes his way.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,  
> here's a new chapter for you, I hope you like it :) Please comment!  
> Enjoy :D

### Chapter 21

 

He can't believe he asked that.

How can he be so incredibly rude to her? Man.

"Idiot," he murmured." Silly, silly, silly. What did you even think."

So it went on until he reached the chamber. Without taking notice of anything around him he rushes through the room and throws his door open. As soon as he walked through he slams it shut again, then throws himself on the bed.

"I had no right. It wasn't appropriate. She's hurt dammit, she was already hurt and I made it even worse!"

The accusations go on. After some time though he calms and thinks about what to do next. Tell Gwen he's sorry for being insensitive, maybe coming up with a solution for -- for what? There is no magical cure for heart pain and there is no solution other than time and forgetting.

But how can she forget Arthur when he's right under her nose.

He, himself, wouldn't, he's sure of that. He would so not.

Maybe he just has to be honest and tell it to Arthur. Maybe they could all have a conversation  and talk about it. Maybe that would be better.

Talk in a conservation -- what else would you do there.

He's nervous. He's feeling guilty. He might be afraid of whatever is to come. He has a right to be like this.

He does.

And he's talking nonsense.

OK.

Breathe Merlin, breathe.

 

Merlin breathed. He has to go find Arthur. Tell him about his conservation with Gwen and then find her and convince her to follow him. Then they can talk about them. What happened and how everything will continue.

Of course Merlin has no idea how this will end. What this will end up to be.

But he has to try.

Has to try to make it right.

 

"Arthur."

He doesn't wake up.

" _Arthur_!" Merlin tries again. "Wake up, I gotta talk to you."

Arthur mumbles in his sleep.

"Come on, it's important! It's about Gwen. We have to talk about her. And with her. She knows. Arthur, she knows about us! Wake up!"

Arthur murmurs again. "Let me sleep."

"No, you gotta wake up. It's about Gwen."

"What's with her?" Arthur doesn't seem any more awake than 5 minutes before.

"She awaited me when I exited your room. She knows about us. I didn't tell her, she already knew."

"What? How did she know?" Suddenly, Arthur is wide awake and sits up. His eyes meet with Merlin's.

"Yes, she does. And I think we should talk to her about it."

"Fine. Find her and bring her here."

Merlin nods. He turns around and walks to the door. When he's just about to open it, he turns to Arthur again. "There's something else."

"What is it?" Arthur groans seeming whacked.

" I think I said something stupid."

Arthur's eyes widen.


	22. Chapter 22 - "Maybe this time two wrongs make a right"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi :)  
> This chapter is really long this time, mostly because it's so important. I hope it comes up to your expectations and I don't leave you disappointed on this matter.  
> I hope you enjoy!
> 
> (This chapter contains refers to 5 Seconds of Summer - Safety pin and Teen Wolf 3x4)

### Chapter 22

 

Merlin finally finds Gwen in her house in the city. She sits on the bed and plays with something in her hand. Her head is lowered.

Not really sure what to start with, he says the first words coming into his mind out loud.

"Gwen? I'm sorry about what I said earlier," Merlin states.

She doesn't look up, her head stays in the same position, but her hands stop for a tiny second.

"No, it's fine, I wanted to hear it. So to be exact, it was my fault."

He stepped in front of her, then squats down.

"But it wasn't fair of me to bring it up in the first place. I'm truly sorry."

She shakes her head and presses the object in her fingers. "You know what this is?" she says looking up, staring into Merlin's eye, catching his glance. "It's a doll made of fabric and string, we stuffed it with straw. My dad said it would be a Constance in my life, even when everything else went away." Tears fill her eyes, which she furiously wipes away. "It's stupid. I'm sorry."

"I don't think it is."

"Yes, it is. I am combining stuff like this-" she holds the puppet up "- with you and Arthur." She lets the puppet fall on the bed. After a pause, she speaks up again. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"That you two are together."

Merlin takes in a deep breath. "I'm not even sure we are." He laughs nervously. "I didn't wanna hurt you. I didn't think about it so much. I knew Arthur liked me in some other way than friendship, and that it could be love. But I didn't know what it was for me, in particular."

"Yeah." She sniffs and wipes away her tears once more. "Apology accepted. And Lancelot -"

"-I shouldn't have said it, I'm sorry. But I didn't only come here to apologize. I wanted to invite you to talk to Arthur and me about ... about everything that's been going on. Agreed?"

She smiles a little smile and nods. "Agreed."

 

A while later they both sit on Arthur's bed, Arthur is sitting with his back against the wall and his arms folded.

"So ... I'll just break the awkward silence and ask what Merlin said to you that he said was so stupid," Arthur says.

Merlin glances over to Gwen, who smiles and shakes her head. "It's all sorted out already. Nothing to worry about."

"Nothing's sorted out," Merlin protests. "I think we should talk about it more further."

"There's nothing to talk about. You apologized to me, which wasn't necessary, and I accepted your apology. Plus, I forgave you. Even before that, I wasn't mad at you. I was mad at myself."

"But-"

"Merlin, we could analyze this to infinity, can't we just move on from it?"

"Guys, I don't get any of what you're saying, could you just tell me what it was about and be fine with it?"

Gwen and Merlin both stare at Arthur in surprise, look at each other and then back to Arthur.

"Y-yeah. Of course," Merlin says but doesn't continue. He looks at Gwen.

"He asked me if there wasn't something between me and Lancelot," she explains.

Merlin frowns. "Well, it wasn't quite like that. I asked what was about him."

"Yeah, but you meant it."

"Sure, but -"

"Hello? Would you please talk to me, I'm right here!" Arthur looks quite like a little child who emphatically wants to play with his siblings, but refuses to play the game they suggest.

"Well, I asked her, if you read between the lines, if Lancelot and her still could be a thing. So I mostly considered her to be with him again. Well, that was exactly what I said ... to ... be, well, um, exact." He clears his throat.

The look Arthur gives him is more than a death wish. It's like he wants to kill him here and now but isn't quite sure if he can risk it with eyewitnesses. Or, eyewitness as a matter of fact.

"What did you even think -" Arthur begins, but is cut off by Gwen.

"It's fine. I ain't hurt. I thought of it myself. I think we should clear our feelings. You two begin, and I am the last to speak. Who begins?" She looks around as if she expected rising hands.

"Alright, I'll do it."

It was Arthur who spoke.

"So, Gwen." He sits up a little more, and turns his body to her so he can speak to her directly, "First, I'm sorry I blew smoke the last few weeks. I do like you Gwen, I always have. But I used this affection to you to get rid of other feelings, to daze me so I forget about the feelings I had. And still have. I'm sorry that I wasn't true to you and not true to myself. If I'd been it, we wouldn't sit here and you wouldn't have to suffer from it," he turns to Merlin, a smile spreading on his face. "As I was me again, after you gave me the remedy, I thought everything was just a dream. Not only because I wished it was, but because I thought you'd never let me do anything of what we did." Gwen lets out a laugh. "No! No. Gosh, I hugged him a lot and I stroked his hair. That was all."

"And you behaved like he was a prince," Gwen giggles.

"Yeah, because he is one. Mine."

Merlin can't help but blush and laugh maybe a little too hysterical."Whatever," he says. "Was that all?"

"No, I have something else to say. I want to apologyse to you, Merlin."

"Apologize?"

"Yeah. I think I was just so furious about what you did to me -"

"I didn't do it on purpose!"

"I know that. But I - OK." Arthur gently takes Merlins hands in his own. "Merlin, I was scared and angry because it took a potion to show -" no way, he wouldn't "- that I treated you like shit."

Wow. "Wow." Merlin repeats out loud.

"No, I'm not finished. I'm sorry for barking orders at you like that. I was an idiot. Forgive me. And I guess the potion not only showed that I treated you like shit, but that I like you. I like you a lot."

"Is this your way of saying that you love me?" Merlin smiles.

"Yes," Arthur says. "It is."

They look at each other and Merlin feels himself melt.

"That's all very well, but if you wanna make out, I pass," Gwen laughs.

Oh, Gwen. Merlin nearly forgot about her. There is a lot of coughing and hemming until it is quiet again.

"I'll continue," Merlin says finally. "Gwen, I'll begin with you as well. You're my best friend." Gwen laughs and a little tear drop finds its way in her eye. "No, really. You are. And I'm sorry that you and Arthur ... that I got between you. There was this one time I tried to get Arthur to propose to you. But he refused. I tried to make his see that status groups don't matter. Now I don't know if I did it because of you or to make the land a better one or because I may have known deep inside, that he means more to me. And Arthur - I didn't give you the remedy on purpose. You know that, I know," he says as Arthur opens his mouth to object. "Once, I hated you. But then I got to know you. Saw your fair way to look at things, saw that you care for your people. What big burden lays on your shoulders. And I started to look at you as a friend. I always tried to protect you though I know I'm just your servant and maybe I shouldn't care too much. But I did, and I think that means something. Some were only born to be kings, because some bloodline made them, but you ain't that way. You were born as a king and as a good one as well."

"So many commitments today," Gwen says. "Then I'll commit something too. I'm going to back you two. I'm your alibi.  Only if you want to, of course. I've given what Merlin said to me some thought. I can be together with Lancelot and you two can be together, too. But for the folk, it'll be me and Arthur. But not for us." She looks at both of them in expectation. "Well? What do you think?"

Arthur nods. "I think for now it's the best we can do. And then, we'll let them know when the time is due."

Merlin nods as well. "That's probably the best. Thank you, Gwen."

"No problem." She smiles. "Maybe this time, two wrongs make a right."


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey :)  
> I wanted to write so badly that it's two chapters today!  
> Hope you enjoy! Leave a comment, please :D

### Chapter 23

 

Sometimes you think you found the perfect solution and then are punched in the face when you recognize that you couldn't have been more geeky. Like really exceptionally stupid.

The first few weeks they thought everything went like clockwork.

They met at night, had their first kiss, talked about their days. Of course there were also nights they didn't meet. At day Arthur would grab Merlin and they'd go into a long forgotten, empty room and kiss.

But something was wrong. Merlin didn't feel whole.

Merlin first had his doubts as he ate with Gaius.

"Well, Arthur and Gwen are such a beautiful couple, aren't they?" Gaius said.

Arthur, Gwen and Merlin had agreed on not telling anyone else about their little agreement. Lancelot of course, but no one else.

That, Merlin realized a few hours later, also involved Gaius. He had told the old man that Arthurs love for him couldn't have been so great, judging by him coming back together with Gwen after a talk in private. Then he had laughed.

"Yeah, they are," Merlin responded.

"I wonder if they will have kids. I think they will, soon. And of course, he'll make her his queen."

Gaius certainly had meant no harm, but Merlin has to admit, it did hurt him. Gwen and Arthur seemed to fit so perfectly and Arthur was surprisingly good at faking a relationship with her.

Then Arthur hadn't had any time for him. They didn't steal themselves away anymore and they didn't meet at night.

They didn't kiss.

They talked.

Merlin began to feel like a concubine, dirty and exploited.

They got into fights.

Mostly they were about space and Gwen.

Merlin is angry because he feels betrayed and used, Arthur is angry because he feels wrongfully blamed for something he hadn't done and "would never do".

The main problem isn't that Arthur didn't give him so much love anymore, it is that he can't show anyone who he's in love with, who he spends his nights with. Why can't they just tell the world? Oh, yeah, forgot. A prince is not to be homosexual. He has to like girls. Princesses. No menservants allowed, sorry.

 

"OK. This ends, here and now," Gwen says one day.

She made both of them come to her house. They sit at the table.

"Merlin, Arthur isn't betraying you with me. And no one else. Obviously, this wasn't the best idea."

"And what do we do, then?" Arthur asks in a weird tone.

He looks at Merlin like he's a dangerous criminal or something.

"We break up first. This shouldn't be a big problem. I'll say I like Lancelot and go with him. You'll forgive me and we'll live here again. And then -"

"That won't work," Merlin says. "You'll be the bad one. One of us will be the bad one, You'll have to break up for good. Say you don't feel the same. Both of you. Then a few months later, you'll find someone else. Stay friends. That's for the best."

"A few months," Arthur says. "That's long."

"It's for the best"

"You cannot say that, Merlin."

"You hear me say it, don't you?"

"Don't be like this."

"Boys, calm down. Merlin's right, a few months. Three months and then you can come out as a couple. It will be OK."

Her glance doesn't let them say another word.

"Arthur, we'll break up tomorrow. I'm sick of being the reason why you two fight," she says the latter and then shoos them out of her house.


	24. Chapter 24

### Chapter 24

 

The excitement was big when Arthur and Gwen went public with their "break-up".

Merlin must admit that he felt a little excited too, but in another way than the citizens.

He felt some pleasing happiness that had him by the short hairs for weeks.

Arthur and Gwen made it simple and short: they organized a plenary and then said that "they didn't fit together anymore", as they formulated it.

The only bad thing about this whole thing is the time Merlin has to wait to kiss Arthur again, to have him, really have him. So they can tell everybody that they're in love.

Arthur plans on making it legal for everyone, no matter from which status group, to marry. So he basically wants to legalize the marriage in between classes.

What Merlin thinks is a big step in ... in everything. Time, and so on.

"I wonder what my father would've said," Arthur once told Merlin. "To you and me. I bet he wouldn't've liked it much, now, would he have?"

"No," Merlin's answered. "But I'm certain that we could've changed his mind."

And he still thinks so.

The three months were the longest Merlin ever needed to experience. Gwen said they needed to leave clues the last month, so sometimes Merlin sneaked out of bed and was seen "by accident" when he slipped through Arthur's door.

This was the best part about the last month: the so-called stolen moments.

And so it wouldn't be a big shock for anyone when they made it public.

 

It was the last day of the third month. Merlin shivered.

"Are we really doing this?" he asked, looking over to Arthur.

"Yes, we are. You don't have to be nervous. It'll be OK."

Merlin had the feeling that Arthur not only tried to comfort Merlin with his words but himself, too.

This was a big deal. Earlier he hasn't realized it so much, hasn't let the thoughts in and his mind imagine the outcome of this. Now it was all clear, placed in rows and incomprehensible.

With this, Arthur could lose his throne. If they didn't understand them, if they want them to get lost and live their way of living somewhere else. A king whose consort can't get any kids. And a bastard from another woman doesn't carry the name of his father.

"We are ahead of our time," Merlin whispered.

"Someone has to be the first," Arthur responded.

_He's right. He's got to be right. You can get through this. There will be a solution._

"I'm their king. They will accept me."

"And if they don't?"

"They will."

"Do you want to be such a king? Do you want them to be forced to accept anything they can't accept?"

They looked at each other. Arthur cupped Merlins face.

"No."

He kissed him.

Stepping onto the balcony, the whole city at their feet, Merlin tried to dispel his angst, tried to take it all in.

The way, Arthurs hand felt like in his own, the way his own chest rose and the his breath was cold in the air, although it was already spring, the way it was as silent as it could have been.

One moment time seemed frozen, everyone staring at them.

"I want to announce that I found a new love and I want everyone of you to know."

Arthur turned to Merlin and smiled.

"It's Merlin."

This was the moment everything exploded. Merlins feelings, the crowd, the colors of his surroundings.

"They cheer, Merlin," Arthur said, little crinkles formed around his eyes as he did.

"Yeah," Merlin said, his breath shakily. "Yeah, they do."

Arthur laughed and kissed Merlin.

Happily, Arthur repeated words, and Merlin knew he was right.

_It's going to be alright. We made it. It's going to be alright._

 

And it is. Arthur and Merlin made sure their kids they may have one day would carry Arthurs name after the wedding.

Gwen really helped them, Lancelot, too. Gaius swears he wouldn't ever brew any dangerous and mind-changing potions again, because they complicate things very fast. But Merlin's sure sooner or later, he will.

They were happy. And complete, although there is a person that's missed.

"What about Morgana?" Merlin asked when the wedding was still planned.

"She's asked to come. But she doesn't want to and ... she wishes us luck," Arthur responded. Merlin could see that it was hard for Arthur to talk about his sister. He took his hand.

"Luck? For what?"

"I don't know. " Arthur sighted. "But I think the time will be hard. Now she can hurt us."

"If she wants," Merlin points out.

"If she wants," Arthur agrees.

"I hope she doesn't."

"I hope that, too."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was it. *sniff* I'll truly miss writing this story. And it's the first actual long one I ever completed. I counted in word: The whole story is 70 pages long (in type size 12 with a line distance of 1.5), this page counted in. This is extremely long for me judging by it being a fan fiction.  
> As I said, there will be more. To explain this further than I did in the comments, this is how it's done:  
> I will add this work to a series called "Potions complicate things very fast - Series".  
> On this chapter in the comments you can write down your ideas to the one-shots I will add to the series.  
> Maybe you want me to write about Arthurs and Merlins wedding or a day in the three months or whatsoever.  
> Also the point of view is a part of the idea, if you don't add a point of view to the idea, I'll write from the one I think is the best.  
> I want to thank everyone who read the story and gave kudos or left a bookmark.  
> Without you, I would never have written the story until the end.


End file.
